Grandparent Humor

We can all use a little grandparent humor in our day. Enjoy!

    My granddaughter came to spend a few weeks with me, and I decided to teach her to sew. After I had gone through a lengthy explanation of how to thread the machine, she stepped back, put her hands on her hips, and said in disbelief, “You mean you can do all that, but you can’t operate my Game Boy?”

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    My grandmother moved in with our family of five. As I was brushing my teeth one morning, she tapped on the door. “Is anyone in there?” she called.
I mumbled an answer, to which she replied, “Is that a yes or a no?”

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    A sweet little boy surprised his grandmother one morning and brought her a cup of coffee. He made it himself and was so proud. He anxiously waited to hear the verdict on the quality of the coffee. The grandmother had never in her life had such a bad cup of coffee, and as she forced down the last sip she noticed three of those little green army guys in the bottom of the cup.
She asked, “Honey, why would three little green army guys be in the bottom of my cup?”
Her grandson replied, “You know grandma, it’s like on TV, ‘The best part of waking up is soldiers in your cup.”

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    Two little boys were visiting their grandfather and he took them to a restaurant for lunch.  They couldn’t make up their minds about what they wanted to eat.
Finally the grandfather grinned at the server and said, “Just bring them bread and water.”
One of the little boys looked up and quavered, “Can I have ketchup on it?”

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    My grandson was visiting one day when he asked, “Granma, do you know how you and God are alike?”
I mentally polished my halo while I asked, “No, how are we alike?”
“You’re both old,” he replied.

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Perhaps you know why women over sixty don’t have babies. They would put them down somewhere and forget where they left them.

Submitted by Qiltmeister

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    I didn’t know if my granddaughter has learned her colors yet, so I decided to test her.  I would point out something and ask her what color it was.  She would tell me and always she was correct.  But it was fun for me, so I continued.  At last she headed for the door, saying sagely, “Grandma, I think you should try to figure out some of these yourself.”

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